Divorce (Kanye’s Version)

By Avnie Saraf

Disclaimer - This blog piece's contents reflect the writer's personal views and not that of Girl Up Janaki.

Divorce. It sounds very complicated and heavy but in simpler terms, it just means to legally end your marriage with another person. In normal scenarios, it’s a pretty personal issue but if you’re a celebrity, it becomes the whole world’s source of entertainment. Everybody reading or tweeting about it will have their own opinion. Some might think it’s irrational, some absurd and others brave. However, the main problem with the world knowing about your personal life is that you no longer have control over the narrative.

The most recent internet scandal has been the separation of Kim Kardashian and Kanye West. Kardashian filed for divorce in February, 2021 after 6 years of marriage with Kanye West. In October 2021, on Saturday Night Live, Kardashian said “I married the best rapper of all time. Not only that, he’s the richest black man in America. A talented, legit genius who gave me four incredible kids. So, when I divorced him, you have to know that it all came down to one thing- his personality.”

However, as easy as it should be for one partner to decide whether they want to stay in a marriage, West’s public and online harassment has made it extremely difficult for Kardashian and her family. Through his Instagram posts, West shared his hopes of getting back together with Kim — who, despite months of Kanye’s public pleas to reunite, has made it clear that she wishes to pursue their divorce. In her declaration, Kardashian appealed for an end to their legal relationship, stating that “no counselling or reconciliation effort” can fix the marriage and adding that “irreconcilable differences” continue to exist between her and Kanye. Aside from this, West is constantly bullying and harassing Kim’s current partner, Pete Davidson as well.

As it has been known, West suffers from bipolar disorder. It's a disorder associated with episodes of mood swings ranging from depressive lows to manic highs. We’ve seen Kanye in a series of chaotic and emotional public outbursts (during his first presidential campaign appearance), as well as a string of incoherent tweets which he subsequently retracted. He even posted a ‘Civil War’ poster with Kanye & Pete’s faces photoshopped in. If I’m being honest, initially it was hilarious.

But gradually, what began as an amusing series of events, became a public display of harassment and ragging. Kanye began showing up to events uninvited. He allegedly sent a truck full of roses to Kim’s house and even bought the mansion across from Kim's. Additionally, he posted screenshots of private chats between them: notably, one where Kardashian asked him to stop “creating a dangerous environment,” adding that should he continue, Davidson would get hurt.

To be clear, these are the actions of an abuser. Many took to social media to express increasing concern over West’s behaviour, noting that the same was concerning and would give domestic violence lawyers enough to go on. When we laughed at first, it may have been because it is amusing to watch a superstar debase themselves publicly after heartbreak. What’s less funny is when they threaten, stalk, harass, and intimidate their ex in the name of passion and self-expression.

Kim Kardashian, being one of the most powerful and resourceful women in the US, had to endure harassment from her ex-husband to a level where it became dangerous for herself, her children and her current partner. Not to mention, it took a full year for their divorce to be finalised, considering that she filed in February 2021 and their marriage was officially dissolved in March 2022. If Kim Kardashian - a woman with numerous resources, a brilliant panel of lawyers and substantial amounts of money cannot navigate through a divorce smoothly, imagine how much more difficult it is for less privileged women. To continue laughing at Kanye’s behaviour would be to trivialise it. And if these were exhibited by a less famous man against a less famous ex-wife, it could turn out to have real, fateful consequences.

One out of three women in the world have been harassed, stalked or intimidated at least once in their life. And even after considering this statistic, it’s unbelievable how often men have been let off the hook for creating such a dangerous living condition. From the age of 13, girls have been taught to carry pepper/mace spray with them to save themselves from strangers that might try to harm them. Even after marriage, there is no guarantee that you won't be abused, emotionally and/or physically.

Harassment and abuse take a long-term toll on the victim’s mental and physical health. An experience can either trigger symptoms of depression and anxiety that are new to the person; or it can exacerbate a previous condition that may have been controlled or resolved. Someone going through or dealing with the aftermath of sexual harassment may also exhibit symptoms of PTSD, especially if the harassment led to violence and/or assault.

It's very easy to go on the internet and say that women should act fast while facing abuse. But it’s way more difficult to actually realise that the partner you once thought you loved, has turned into someone that you don't feel safe around anymore. Instead of questioning why a woman didn’t make the decision to leave her partner earlier, the question should be; Why did the partner create such an unbearable marriage condition? It’s brave for the victim to end the marriage, not cowardly to stay. The abuser is responsible for what they did, aren’t they?

Sources:

• https://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/pictures/kim-kardashian-kanye-west-every-allegation-in-messy-divorce/the-pete-davidson-factor/

• https://www.cosmopolitan.com/entertainment/celebs/a35419007/kim-kardashian-kanye-west-divorce-timeline/

• https://pagesix.com/2022/02/15/kanye-west-takes-accountability-for-harassing-kim-kardashian/