Sex Ain't No Impurity

By Sarisha Jaggi

Trigger warning - mentions of r*pe, sexual assault

How often do you come across people whose parents talk to them about sex? Or for that matter, any Indian film that depicts that a parent and a child are having a heart-to-heart about their sex life? Usually, we don’t come across parents having a real talk with their teenagers. Classic Indian parents are believed to be strict and forcing while imposing their thoughts on their youngsters. A possible theory of why people think so could be because once a girl starts to menstruate, or when a boy develops a hoarse voice, most of our parents start to indirectly tell us that we should not be in a physical relationship. They force that thought on us, without giving us a reason as to why not. This is where sex education comes in.

It is a common delusion that sex education is just about what sex is. What society doesn’t realize is that there is a lot more ground to cover than just that. Sex education is not just a meticulous summary and studying the pros and cons of having sex, but also a feeling of cerebral peace, peace with how a person is and accepting themself so. The lack of sex education leads to our parents pressing their beliefs on us. This is because most of our parents aren’t comfortable talking to us about sex, which is wrong. The fact that we are neither taught about sex in structure at school nor are our parents willing to share their wisdom with us, leads to a lot of misinformation, confusion, curiosity and above all, a lack of crucial information. This is where I believe the teachers can take charge. If sex education was given to us at school, our parents would feel easier to talk to us about it and would have the pressure to keep up with the school’s curriculum.

Some of us who are privileged are at the very least taught basics about sexual intercourse, whereas, still in some rural areas, it’s taboo to even talk about reproduction as a biology topic. While most certainly there has been an improvement over the years, and we are given necessary sex education, I believe there is still a lot to discover.

Although some schools in rural areas, as of 2021 have started to teach about the basics of fertility, there are also girls in similar rural areas who don’t know about menstruation when they have their first period, which demonstrates a serious lack of knowledge.

With the internet in our hands and resource material at our fingertips, a lot of teenagers have got to know more than what their parents want them to. This has exposed the youth to a lot of information, some of it is inaccurate, and some of it is misinterpreted. When we talk about sex, while the basic processes of menstruation, puberty and sperm release are essential, so is information about teen pregnancies and STDs.

Did you know that there were about 1.1 million people in the United States, living with HIV in 2019? While this is an alarming number, what is more shocking is that about 15% of the people don’t know they have HIV. Diseases like Genital herpes, AIDS, Gonorrhea and Syphilis among others are sexually transmitted diseases (STDs.) These infections have severe results/symptoms like sore genitals, the body’s ability to fight infections and permanent infertility. AIDS, a reason for the deaths of millions is a disease that has no cure yet, and a matter of concern is one of the most commonly heard about STD. Although these diseases can also be transferred due to sharing the same needle and breastfeeding, sex is the most common way it is transferred. Knowledge about the same can prevent a person from having multiple sexual partners which can be a hygienic hazard as well.

According to data, teen pregnancies have drastically heightened in India over the years. Teen pregnancy just like the name suggests is when a girl aged between the ages of 13-19 gets pregnant. While I support the women, who gave birth to their babies as teenagers and believe that the choice should be left to the parents, it is extremely tortuous and harmful to the body as the body of a teen is not ready for pregnancy-related high blood pressure or contractions. A not-so-widely known fact is that it is illegal to have sex in India before the age of 18. “India's age of consent for sex is 18 under the Criminal Law (Amendment) Act, 2013.” Naturally, with teen pregnancy rates going up, abortion rates also increase. A lot of people believe that if they get pregnant, they can just get an abortion done. It’s like a way out of the situation. What people tend to forget is that the pills that a woman has to consume to abort the fetus in her vagina are of extremely high dosage and can leave a lasting impact on a person’s body. Using a condom if one isn’t ready to have a child and having birth control pills is a suggested way to avoid getting pregnant.

Another part of sex education would be sexual harassment. We often come across news of women getting raped, and of getting sexually harassed which is as disturbing as it is disappointing. If from the beginning, at a young age, people are taught about how a NO is a NO and it cannot be changed into a yes by force, sexual harassment cases should come down. If people are taught about consent, and learn to respect other’s choices, the world might just end up alright!

I believe sex education is also about loving oneself, accepting and respecting oneself. When at times we come across our girlfriends who haven’t yet had their periods, we look at her with pity, and if one of our guy-friends develops a hoarse voice, we tease him for the same. What we don’t realize is how this could shatter their self-esteem. There are hormonal complications such as PCOD or PCOS, that lead to a person having their periods later than others whereas a guy’s hoarse voice is the result of a stretched Adam's apple. Workshops that explain these complications and spread the word about self-love can really help. With people being constantly worried about how they look, these workshops can help a person accept themself the way they are.

To summarize, all I’d like to say sex education is just as important as any other subject, probably even more so because it is the reason for one’s existence! Sex isn’t impure and vulgar, so it’s high time we give our youth the right amount of knowledge they need in order to be safe! Jenny Slate once famously quoted, “I got great sex education, and I always knew that if I wanted to be sexually active, I had to have safe sex.” In the same manner, let us make sure sex education is provided to our younger generations, and that parents are comfortable talking to their kids about the same!